Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Letting Go

First there is the physcial-ness of leaving...getting rid of your possessions, arranging for a place to stay...arranging for the place you are leaving...saying goodbye to family and friends slowly...over time....trying to give everyone their needed attention and knowing that you were not able to accomplish all of this, at least not graciously.

And then you places, and the novelty maintains you for a while, until the adrenaline works its way through your veins, is metabolised and then flushed through and out your system.

What is left?  It is your soul...that deep seeded ache that you realize is calling to you to pay it some attention.  And we each tend to our needs in different ways.  For me my soul screams for nature and creativity...and I'm fortunate that I've chosen a place full to the brim of both.  And yet nurturing my soul is an active process.  It is an attentive exercise.  I need to remind myself that being with and around artists is part of my soul's maintenance regime...and that I have and will continue to give myself license to stoke these expose myself to as much of it as possible...because I feel full, filled after basking in the creative glow.  My souls feels at peace once more.

I think this soul nurturing is what has been most difficult to reach, identify and fulfill.  I feel I've only started the process here in Mexico...that I've only begun to understand how important it truly is.  I've had wonderful mentors throughout my parents, my friends, my partner, gifted individuals who were so talented that they were practically savants...and I've had the opportunity to watch and learn from them...and yet, I feel new...starting over...again.  I don't think this process ever ends...not for some of us.

Peace can be found throughout...almost like layers of rock formed throughout layer is the struggle, another the understanding....and somewhere in the striations are the layers of peace and contentment.  Together all the layers make a life, and they are not as stable or as strong without one another.  Take away one layer and the rock collapses.

Here's to our layers.  May they come in all colors, shapes and sizes, different thicknesses and densities...for having all these, we are whole.


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